Introduction

RS: Hi, this is Robin Sparkman, Wellesley class of ’91 and StoryCorps CEO. At StoryCorps, we believe in preserving and sharing humanity’s stories in order to build connections between people and create a more just and compassionate world. As a part of that vital work, we partnered with Wellesley College since 2015 to record over 50 stories with alumnae, students, faculty, and other members of the unique Wellesley Community.  Today, we’re going to hear three stories that celebrate the ties that bind Wellesley women. I hope you enjoy hearing these voices from the Wellesley community.

Jeanne and Jean

JE: I’m Jeanne Emanuel. I’m 47 years old and I’m at my 25th college reunion at Wellesley College.

JH: My name is Jean Hynes. I’m 47 years and I am at my 25th college reunion at Wellesley College, class of ’91.The very first time we met was outside of the art history on our way back from class.

JE: And I remember your green eyes. And it was a beautiful fall day. And finally we got to meet after everybody telling us that we should be friends and that we should meet.

JH: And then I think we really got to know each other on this trip to New York. So, Wellesley offered a trip to New York to look at a bunch of businesses and that’s when I think we really spent a lot time with each other, on the bus.

JE: And that’s when I realized I think invest banking may not be for me? But we became friends because of that trip so it was a worthwhile time. And I remember your pleated skirt and a messenger bag  across your body and a blue blazer.

JH: I’m happy to say I don’t wear plaid skirts anymore

JE: It was cute. Do you remember driving me to New York?

JH: Your parents rented a mini wan.

JE: Yup, And we loaded up everything that I was willing to move to New York city. There aren’t that many friends that would drive someone 250 miles to New York, load everything into the service elevator, and leave you in an apartment for the first time.

JH: I remember feeling really sad leaving you though.  

JE: Yeah I felt sad too.

JH: Yeah

JE: But Wellesley has given us this great gift of friendship.

JH: Yes.

JE: And we’ve had so many life experiences, even when we weren’t living nearby, we would always find a way to be together. And then when we were living closer to each other, our families getting to know and love each other as much as we do with each other and between the two of us there are six girls.

JH: Yes six beautiful daughters.

JE: Could be the next generation of Wellesley graduates.

JH: I really hope one of my daughters goes to WEllesley

JE: But even it they don’t, The spirit of Wellesley, I think, is part of our parenting.

JH: Absolutely. That’s always been a way where you can pass on passion and judgement: the love of life.

JE: I think my girls feel that they can truly pick what they want to do and that they have the hope and the capability and the intelligence and the access to anything and I think that is something Wellesley gives its students and its communities. This idea that if you’re interested in it, it’s there for you regardless of the fact that their a women, that they have access to what they really wanna do and what they believe in.

Sally and Helen

SG: I’m Sally Greenville. I am 62 years old.

HM: And I am Helen Criz Marshall. I am 61.

SG: Helen, it’s been said that our shared future belongs to intellectually gifted and deeply purposeful women, that is Wellesley women. I see you as one of the most purposeful woman I know. Can you tell me a bit about how Wellesley has shaped your sense of purpose over the years, whether in your home life or your professional career: this “Wellesley Effect”?

HM: Wellesley has given me a sense that I have a purpose and I need to follow it. Whoever came up with the term “the Wellesley Effect” really captured something that we’ve been talking about. We had a Wellesley gathering in my house and there was another alum who’s a 1960 graduate and she looked around and she said, “Helen, it really is true; there is something about a group of Wellesley women.” I think that we are more than the sum of our parts. You get us together and we create something additional just by being together.

SG: One of the things that I personally have found most rewarding is being about to connect with women through the generations where we both have a common point of departure.

HM: We’re all predisposed to like each other even though we’ve never met each other.

SG: Yeah.

HM: So, I do not feel hesitant to walk up to another alum and just talk to her where you might feel hesitant in some other situation.

SG: And we’re all very competitive, but Helen wouldn’t you agree that we are quite cooperative and wishing the best for our fellow alums whether that’s mentoring or just giving a leg up along the way.

HM: That’s true! Sometimes we don’t all feel so fabulous about ourselves. I was thinking of myself: I am sitting in a pew in the Wellesley Chapel, next to me is that marble bar relief, Mother Wellesley sending her daughter off into the big world with her arms around her daughter and pointing to the future and her daughter has the book of knowledge in her hand and the lamp of learning as she strides forward. So, I’m sitting in a pew and I say, “Oh woe is me. I’ll never be secretary of state. I’m not publisher of a magazine. I’ve never flown the space shuttle”, which all of our folks have done. And, I’m just moping. So Mother Wellesley looks at me, steps of the wall, comes over to me and puts her hand on my shoulder and says, “Dear, what’s the matter”. And I say, “I’m just feeling inadequate amongst all these beautiful, you know, universiverse of constellation of Wellesley women and I’m just like a burned out little dwarf star.” And she says, “Dear, who do you think you are?” And I say “Well, my name is Helen and I’m a Wellesley graduate.” And she says, “Yes. You know all of these fabulous Wellesley women. Well you’re one of them! You know that? You have got 35, 000 people who have never met you all cheering for you to do well. So, I want you to get up, figure out what it is you want to do, and go do it. We have got your back.” And I said, “Yes ma’am!”.    

SG: And you have never looked back Helen.

HM: Well, there’s a whole community of people out there. 35, 000 is how many living alumnae we have and I like the feeling that one, I have this education, I feel like I can do, and I feel like there is a whole group of people out there wanting me to do well and I feel like that is one way to describe the Wellesley Effect.

Marah and Judith

MH: My name is Marah Ann Katz Herbach, and I’m sitting at Wellesley College alongside my mother.

JK: Judith Margolis Katz, this is my 50th reunion. I had fallen in love with the concept of economics when I was in high school, so I was predisposed to take that economics course. And the woman who taught my entry-level economics course, who was the chairman of the department at the time, was Carolyn Shaw Bell who you know, I stayed in touch with so long, and who was a great touchstone, I considered a friend. I see that you established great friendships, that you had a very successful extracurricular program.

MH: I think you’re referring to choir predominantly, and my closest friends from college are my choir friends. Singing was always, for me, a break and a relief, so no matter how much one focused on classwork, it was a totally different set of skills and, if you will, a different part of my brain. It was also fun. And those friends that I have from choir, are friends whom, whenever I see them, it’s like we’ve never been apart. I would love to hear how you think of Wellesley, as your mother’s institution?

JK: Audrey Price Margolis Kauffman, class of ’35, was very proud of her Wellesley experience. She was proud of being a great student. She and my father moved from Boston to Albany when they got married in 1939, and Mom got involved with the Wellesley club there.

MH: Her affiliation to Wellesley through her club in Albany, built friendships for her and indirectly then for you and for me that yielded many unexpected things, some tangible and others not. But one of the tangible ones, when Johnathan and I got married, an enormous box arrived on our doorstep. I couldn’t fathom what this was, and I’m embarrassed that I can’t remember the woman who sent it.

JK: Oh, it’s Adi De Beer Muhlfelder, who was class of ’41.

MH: Adi sent this enormous box of dishware that I’d never seen before. I guess at one point in time, Wellesley had china with pictures of the campus, especially of Tower Court, in different colors. And I remember opening that box and feeling like, like your mom was there.

JK: Did I say, that it wasn’t until you told me that we’d be sharing a reunion, that I realized you were applying to Wellesley? So, this is the first reunion we’ve had since your kids were born, and especially it’s my 50th, makes it more special than I could ever believe.

Introduction

RS: Hi, this is Robin Sparkman, Wellesley class of ’91 and StoryCorps CEO. At StoryCorps, we believe in preserving and sharing humanity’s stories in order to build connections between people and create a more just and compassionate world. As a part of that vital work, we partnered with Wellesley College since 2015 to record over 50 stories with alumnae, students, faculty, and other members of the unique Wellesley Community.  Today, we’re going to hear three stories About making friends at Wellesley. The college is so well known for lifelong friendships. I hope you enjoy hearing these voices from the Wellesley community.

Tracey and Pam

TC: My name is Tracey Cameron.

PM: And I am Pam McNeil.

TC: This is your 35th anniversary. And I wanted to know, why Wellesley?

PM: I did not consciously choose to come to Wellesley College. I ended up graduating from a magnet high school with a focus in science and technology, and would often be one of a handful of girls in my math and science classes. And so I started experiencing some sexism in those courses. But, the entire time I was looking at colleges, Oberlin College was my first choice. Oberlin was attractive to me because of its long history as a diverse campus, and a place that was committed to the education of blacks and whites together. I applied to Oberlin, I applied to Wellesley, and I applied to Carnegie Mellon. I got into all of those places and I came here to Wellesley. And from the minute I stepped on campus, I was in awe. First, because I had gotten a lot of brochures in the recruiting process, brochures with all of these beautiful pictures of the campus. I stepped foot here, it was like, "Oh my God. It really does look exactly like in the brochures." So that was one of the first things that struck me, is the awesome beauty of the campus. But, from every encounter I had in that 24-hour overnight, I just met all of these women who were very diverse. And I got the sense that, you know, it just meant to me that if you come here, it doesn’t matter who you are, you’re not gonna be put in a box. You’re gonna be able to be, and grow into being, the woman that you were born to be. And so, I got off the plane when I returned back home to D.C., I literally told my Dad, I don’t know what you’re gonna have to do to make it happen, but that’s where I’m going.

TC: What about friendships? What are your memories there?

PM: The first day of school, there’s a lunch on the President’s Lawn that was part of the orientation for first year activities. And so, I’m at this huge thing with more than 500 of my classmates, and I’ve run into this young lady, her name was April and she came from Los Angeles. And it turned out we were in the same dorm. And so, we became fast friends, and... almost, I wouldn’t say inseparable, but we spent a lot of time doing things, supporting each other, during the four years, and we have been friends ever since. My freshman roommate was very different from me. She was extremely introverted, extremely shy. She became my shadow probably for the first six months, and she went everywhere with me. She was not a woman of color and people would always ask me, "Well, who is she and why is she here?" I’m like, "That’s my shadow; that’s my freshman roommate."

TC: Yeah.

PM: But, she blossomed eventually, you know, and became a journalist, and lives in Washington, and so we have maintained a friendship for those, what? 39 years I guess it’s been. I just had friends that ended up everywhere, lifelong friendships.

Evelyn and Anne

EG: My name’s Evelyn Gough. I’m 70 years old. I’m speaking with Anne Damsgaard who was my roommate and college classmate for the four years at Wellesley.

AD: I’m Anne Damsgaard. My age is 71. When I first came to Wellesley, I had never been been away from home for even one night, so I actually was quite homesick, but I remember meeting you the very first day and we had such a great friendship right from the beginning. That was a very significant effect in ameliorating that aspect for me.

EG: We seemed to have an ability to chat and talk with each other so easily right from the beginning.

AD: and then after college, I remember we could have three hour phone conversations without any problem at all. So it was a very easy and natural relationship right from the beginning.

EG: Well we had a ritual of actually gathering after dinner, of having a coffee, listening to music. I remember so fondly of listening to "Camelot" umpteen million times.

AD: Right.

EG: And then, sometimes with other friends from down the hall, most often, and then breaking up and going off to our individual studies. And that was a required ritual. It gave us the way to get through the night.

AD: Right. It was really fun. I remember doing that and it just was a nice bonding time, and we could talk about anything. We could talk about the politics of the day, or frustrations with school, or anything. It was almost a little bit like a family having dinner together. It was a chance to chat about your day and what you were thinking about.

EG: I knew that Ann came from the Northeast and I came from Long Island. So, we had some common bonds. We knew the geography of the area. We weren’t too far from home. And then later we discovered we had many deeper ties. Unexpectedly I learned the her father had come from China and his family had been four generations in China, where my parents came from and that was something we learned a lot more about a time went one and it gave us another level of bonding, which I think has helped. And surprisingly, or not, even our children our close, which you don’t expect because you don’t influence that at all. But they’ve had a chance to meet each other and they’ve become good friends. So, that’s very nice to see happen.

AD: That’s true. It was such a special thing to just be able to just develop your relationships with women and really enjoy other women and they were so remarkable.

EG: And I think there’s still, in modern America, maybe internationally, a kind of confidence gap between men and women and as long as that remains, I think all women’s education really is a very good way of addressing that for many women.

Ann and Maude

AR: My name is Ann Clark Rockefeller-Roberts, and I am from the class of 1956.

MC: And my name is Maude Chaplin, I’m 80 years old, and I’m talking with my former roommate. I went to a public high school in New Jersey, I went to Wellesley College thinking I was going to meet all these women who were interested in art, and literature, and ideas. And this was actually the day of registration, I was filled with anticipation, standing in line, looking at all these, we called them, girls, then. And I probably looked somewhat reserved, because I’m a shy person.

AR: I was doing the same thing, filled with anticipation, and excited to be there, and I’m curious, and also feeling shy, and protective of my family name, which sometimes caused discomfort from other people. Then I saw this tall, graceful woman, so I kind of sidled over and said, "Oh, that’s a beautiful piece of driftwood. Where did you find it?" And then we just fell into conversation, and our sophomore year, we became roommates, and we were roommates throughout.

MC: We met each other, and there was an initial connection. And there was another one too, which I didn’t really appreciate at the time, but you did tell me later. You introduced yourself as Ann Rockefeller, you had to. I mean, that was your name, and I said immediately, "Oh, that’s the name of my postman!"

AR: Which means you saw me.

MC: Right.

AR: That Rockefeller was just the name of your postman.

MC: Right, exactly.

AR: Which is fantastic!

MC: I could see relief or something,

AR: Yes.

MC: Coming over your face. But what really got us together, I think, was, we both were interested in those who didn’t have the opportunities that we had. The less fortunate in this world, and what can we do about it.

AR: Yes.

MC: And we were both very interested in that, all the way through Wellesley.

AR: I found, being in a woman’s college, where you weren’t either competing with men all the time, or trying to get a date,

MC: Right.

AR: I found it absolutely wonderful.

MC: We had good years at Wellesley, I mean my memories are almost all good. I will tell you one story on you, you met your future husband in England, and you were smitten, and he was at seminary in Wisconsin.

AR: Episcopalian seminary.

MC: And so you used to go out to see him every weekend that you felt you could. And you came back from one weekend, and we were walking together to class, and I said, "Ann, we’re going to have a quiz today on Don Quixote." And you said, the 1950’s equivalent of "oh my God. I haven’t read it yet.” So I very quickly told you what it was about, so we took the quiz, and you got an A-, and I got a B+. I was very bitter about that.

AR: I would imagine.

MC: But our friendship survived, yes.

AR: I have had several lifetime friends. The most close one being you. Most loyal.

Introduction

RS: Hi, this is Robin Sparkman, Wellesley class of ’91 and StoryCorps CEO. At StoryCorps, we believe in preserving and sharing humanity’s stories in order to build connections between people and create a more just and compassionate world. As a part of that vital work, we partnered with Wellesley College since 2015 to record over 50 stories with alumnae, students, faculty, and other members of the unique Wellesley Community.  Today, we’re going to hear three stories that begin to explore all the ways Wellesley women are making a difference. I hope you enjoy hearing these voices from the Wellesley community.

Deborah and Shannon

DB: I am Deborah Sager Burnbagh. I’m 52 years old, class of Wellesley 1987.

SL: My name is Shannon Langston, I’m also 52. And we are dear, dear friends since the first day of school. I really enjoyed all female. No matter what, whether it’s subconscious or not, I think that when you mix guys, girls, you worry about what you’re gonna wear to class maybe, things like that. I don’t think we had to worry about that. I have friends that have daughters, they’re in big state colleges, they won’t raise their hand.

DB: In class.

SL: Because, you know, it’s just completely contrary to what we learned.

DB: I learned that every leader was a woman.

SL: That’s right.

DB: And so to me, learning that women could do all those leadership roles, was really transformative. And when I left and worked on Wall Street after college, its only because there was a Wellesley woman, they called it Wall Street Warmup, and you used to follow alumns around in their jobs, and it makes younger women think, "I can do that!" And so for me, that single-sex environment was really what created seeing leaders who look like me.

SL: Right.

DB: So after you left Wellesley, fast-forward to your job and how did what you learned at Wellesley help inform how you are today?

SL: I went to Emery, graduated from law school, studied for the bar, and became Deputy Prosecuting Attorney, then went from that into District Judge, and, I might say, handedly beat several men in several different elections.

DB: There you go, you go girl!

SL: Was it 2009, we were all together, I think we were in Park City, and we were at a restaurant. Just a table full of women and I sat back and listened and you were talking about investment banking and politics and how things were affecting the global economy, and I said, "You know what, you girls, you ladies, y’all could rule the world." And I really, I meant that. I said, "Y’all could rule the world."

DB: It is amazing that leadership is the only option. It’s sort of what we were taught. It’s not an option, it’s the only option, in whatever you do. You just need to do everything to your fullest. That’s sort of what Wellesley brought out in us.

Desiree and Alexa

AR: This is Alexa Rice, I’m 27 years old, and I am here with Desiree Rogers, my aunt. So what was your experience like on campus?

DR: I’d never gone to a school that had as much diversity as Wellesley did in my whole life. The high school I went to literally had eight African Americans. So this was very different for me, not to mention all the nationalities and all the international students. And then just all of the students from all over the country.

AR: Sometimes even though a place is diverse, a lot people tend to stay to themselves. Did you find that Wellesley was an inclusive place? Where it was easy to meet people outside of the normal people you would’ve met?

DR: My roommate had never met a black person. So that was a little bit intense, not for me, but for her. There certainly was quite a bit of opportunity whether it be in the dorms, or your next door neighbor or whatever, to mix and mingle with whoever was around. But I think people tended to stick together with people that more looked like them. Just because I think they were comfortable. Especially at the beginning.

AR: Yes, I think that’s probably normal for everywhere. Given that Wellesley is such a great supporter and champion of all women’s causes, do you feel that they did an equal job in supporting women of color? Cause, at least I found when I was in college, there’s a different kind of burden put on someone who is both female and a minority. Especially when you get out of the workplace. So have you noticed that the Wellesley effect has had a positive impact on you as a woman and also as a woman of color?

DR: I would say two things. Wellesley can be such a positive place. Doesn’t mean every experience is positive, but they’re always are very open to let’s figure out, let’s talk about it, we don’t all have to agree. It’s a very safe place in that you don’t feel like the college is necessarily judging you. That’s not real life. The world is not that. People could take offense to what you have to say. Some people will not like your opinions. Some people will not like just the mere fact that you are female or minority, and you have to be prepared for that.

AR: I can’t think of any other place that is as open and as accepting as Wellesley. For me, I think, it is tricky when you leave Wellesley and go into a work environment where it’s not as accepting, but at the same time, I found that the freedom Wellesley gave me to express myself helped me to do the same thing in many other environments. Even when I knew the odds were stacked against me because they didn’t like the fact that I was a woman, that I was a black woman especially. And that’s the thing I think you really can only find at a place like Wellesley.

DR: Having gone to Wellesley prepared me to be fearless. And certainly not to fear my peer set just because they happen to be male. That’s why I think the Wellesley is so good. Because it really teaches you, if you pay attention, confidence, courage, all of those things that are so important that will be voices in your head as you move through your life.

Diana and Lulu

DCW: My name is Diana Chapman Walsh. I am 71 years old.

LCW: My name is Lulu Chow Wong. I’m also 71 years old.

DCW: The first thing I want to say is thank you. You know, when I was a candidate for the presidency of Wellesley College, I felt your support from the minute I walked in the room and every minute thereafter. You were such an important trustee. When I came in to the presidency, the tradition had always been that a male trustee chaired the investment committee and ran the endowment. These wonderful men from Boston who saw this jewel of a college, understood how important it was, and contributed their time to helping make it strong and healthy, and the idea was men knew how to do money and the women would do the things women know how to do, historically. The educational mission and all of that. And it became clear that we were at a moment when we now had enough women who were really sophisticated about investments, they had been on the investment committee, but we still had male leadership of that committee. And I remember that there was a very delicate piece of work we did, just gently without ruffling any feathers, but recognizing, okay, it’s time. And you then became the first woman chair of the investment committee, if I’m not mistaken, didn’t you?

LCW: Yes. Yeah. And I think the lesson taken from that is that when you are dealing with people, particularly men of good will, but you’re going to be doing something that they may feel uncomfortable with, you need to judge them by their good will, rather than there being obstacles. And you learn to work with them. And working with them from inside the system is far more effective and graceful than trying to storm the ramparts. If you trust that they want to achieve the same objectives of excellence for the institution, then you all work together and you’re truly comrades together. And having that objective in common makes things much easier.

DCW: And that’s the way the transition went.

LCW: Also I was very keenly aware that the senior staff of the investment team were all women, and they were very closely watching what was going on. Here there was this first woman on this investment committee with all heavyweight men, and they were seeing how I was going to maneuver. You were mentoring. And I look back on what were the things we felt we accomplished the most. I think, in my life, it’s when a young woman often comes up to me and say, "Oh, you made such a difference. I learned so much just watching what you were doing. Now I can figure out how I navigate my own career." And so I’ve had a number of those young women come up and say, "Lulu, it’s just amazing. You bided your time, you’ve proved your worth, and you absolutely came out on top." It was a lesson that they’d learned that patience and assuming good will is a very important presumption. It’s wonderful to see the young ones coming behind us.

DCW: Oh, it’s everything. That’s what gives me hope.

LCW: It is wonderful to see their idealism.

DCW: It is.

LCW: And I’m sure they’ll keep much of it. They’ll learn some lessons from we old warhorses, and we comrades in the trenches, but they will always keep that idealism.